Thanks to a friend, I was pointed towards a new advice blog that’s sprung up on the internet. Ladies, you’re in luck! This is the rare advice column that gives you what you really need — no, not coupons for cut rate moscato and bulk watermelon Twizzler purchases — but real talk for women. From men!
Personally, as a woman, I do look to anonymous men on the internet to tell me how to live my life. Particularly when that advice contains shrewd insights like:
Regarding women body shaming other women
On a side note, if women are wondering when Marilyn became unattractive it’s when men found out she was certifiably crazy, a whore who got together with married men and men with girlfriends, addicted to drugs, and high maintenance with her “If you cant accept me at my worst” quote. No one wants to deal with that no matter how pretty a size 16 she was.
On the teenager suspended from school for wearing shorts
Newsflash teenage girl who thinks she is taking a stand: Your high school is dishing out life lessons everyday, and you just got served with two. In the real world, you are a sexual object to men. Literally every guy you meet from the moment you turn “18″ until you look like a grandma is going to going to decide whether or not they would have sex with you within the first minute of meeting you. Don’t worry, the decision is never set in stone and subject to change.
Now, we could spend some time here taking apart these completely inane pieces of ‘advice’. But as a lady on the internet, as I know many of you are, we all know this kind of ridiculousness doesn’t deserve our time. Except for the precious seconds we need to spend finding the perfect internet reaction gif to respond to these douches when they inevitably tell us we don’t care for their guidance because we’re feminazis who hate men and like cats too much. To that end, allow me to offer you this fine selection of misandry gifs for you to use in your adventures in cyberspace.
Fun facts, kids. My spellcheck doesn’t even recognize “misandry” as a word. All hail our feminazi sisters behind the dictionary!